My daughter Erin and I went to see the Cardinals play the Cubs last week and of course we won, 7-6. I wrote the following poem the night before and put it on a t-shirt. Hope you like it!
THE CUBBIE DINOSAUR
I saw a Cubbie Dinosaur at the baseball park today
Talking to the manager. Here’s what I heard them say.
“I hope we win the Series. I can’t recall when we last did.”
“I can,” said the Cubbie Dinosaur. “Why I was just a kid!”
Byron von Rosenberg © May 14, 2012
With the Cards playing the Cubs for opening day, this seems appropriate. Here’s the poem that started it all as the season starts.
CUB-PLETELY RIDICULOUS!
I hear that in Chicago where the Cubbies rule
They like to say their team makes all the others drool.
But they last won the Series in nineteen hundred eight,
A feat they dream of often but cannot duplicate!
They didn’t turn the lights on in Wrigley Field at all
‘Til the eighties in the summer and NEVER in the fall.
They should call on Moses to come and set them free
But he would find that harder than the parting of the sea!
They have scientists and doctors of great and world renown
Yet haven’t found the formula to bring those rings to town.
But I have a solution so they can make their Series plans:
Drive five hours south and DRESS AS CARDINALS FANS!
Byron von Rosenberg © July 9, 2011
Here is the poem and the bumper sticker! Get both at the “I Don’t Want to Kiss a Llama!” store in Chesterfield Mall! And, please, follow the advice and be safe!
Some retirement, eh Tony?
THE ELEPHANT KEEPER
An elephant keeper named Tony asked me to give him some clues
Regarding the whereabouts of his missing shoes.
I told him he had to dig deep and now he’s going to choose
And I think it is his new job that he is planning to lose.
Byron von Rosenberg © November 3, 2011
I wrote this at Channel 2 this morning while waiting to go on the show with my Cardinals poems and to announce the arrival of Who’s Been Kissing Super-Frog? Albert, we want you to decide what’s best for you and your family because that means you’d be staying here as a Cardinal! So we shamelessly say, please stay!
And now that you’ve decided to go to California, take our best wishes with you until and unless we meet in the World Series. Go Cards!
ALBERT THE WISE
You have an important decision as young people so often do
And we old people know it. We’ve had lots of them, too.
So take a look at your options. Yes, truly you should!
You have so much to consider because you’re really that good!
Think of what makes you happy especially your children and wife.
Decide, then put it behind you and set about living your life.
It will be a reflection of the things inside you hold dear
Which is why we think that St. Louis is where you should spend your career.
Think how high you can fly with those powerful Cardinal wings.
I believe you could carry the weight of several more World Series rings.
So consider this with the money which I hope is a very large sum:
BEST YEAR
BEST TEAM
BEST PLAYER
WITH ALL OF THE BEST YET TO COME!
Byron von Rosenberg © November 6, 2011
They don’t give a poet much time. I’m changing computers out all day long and trying to catch up and write about the news at night! Took a few snippets of info I’d heard about Tony and wrote this. Thanks, Tony, for a great ride!
AN ODE TO TONY L
I never knew you, Tony, but still you made me laugh
And cry and bang my head while you explained a gaffe.
I heard you were a lawyer in one news report
And a conference with the media was like a day in court!
We liked to ride you, Tony. All fans do, of course,
And so we’re glad they put your name on a baby horse!
They say you micro managed as you watched the game unfurl
And now that you’re retired: Did you really bring that squirrel?
You did bring three new pennants, two with Series rings,
And before we let you go we have to say some things.
“Thank you, Tony L., though you don’t smile a lot.
With you in command we always had a shot.
Despite your disposition you brought us lots of fun.
We’re glad you stayed so long but mostly ’cause you won.
You gave and got the best of the players and the fans
And since you’ve been ‘promoted’ come join us in the stands.
And after spring and summer as autumn breezes swirl
Still we’re gonna ask you,
‘REALLY! DID YOU BRING THE SQUIRREL?’”
Byron von Rosenberg © October 31, 2011
ELEVEN N ELEVEN
St. Louis has long been known for culture, song and dance
And with the fair and movie, finish and romance.
But that was when the Cubs were kings a hundred years ago.
Ain’t nobody still alive who ever saw that show!
See, now I have an i-phone that plays a different tune –
Some crazy bird up in the sky is tryin’ to touch the moon!
It’s riding on a baseball! That’s a freaky thing.
You can’t fly in space on no earthly wing!
It’s defying gravity like fork and spoon and cow
And now I’m rising with it and all I can say is, “WOW!”
Eleven N Eleven! It was so unexpected
But now there’s one more Series win St. Louis has collected.
Eleven N Eleven! Now it’s history
And the spirit of this team is stuck inside of me!
It is the best of times, Eleven N Eleven,
So come home to St. Louis ‘cause this is Baseball Heaven!
And until you do you never got no clue at all
‘Cause there’s minor leagues and major leagues
And then there’s
CARDINALS BALL!
Byron von Rosenberg © October 29, 2011
